She Was Brave Parts 1-11
She woke up in a cold sweat and reached for the night light. It was three in the morning. Traci rolled over and looked at her husband of seven years. Don was sound asleep and snoring as always. She found her slippers and robe and went down stairs for a drink. Maybe she was turning into an alcoholic? The last few weeks Traci found herself awake and alone in the early morning hours with a glass of wine. Her friends told her there wasn’t anything wrong with having a glass of wine to put herself back to sleep. But Traci knew better. She had never liked to drink before. This was not the life she had envisioned for herself when she had gotten married. She had two beautiful children and a husband. Yet, she was always alone.
With a heavy sigh, she walked out onto the patio. The night was beautiful! That was the one saving grace in her lonely existence; the nights in the country were welcoming. Especially in the fall with the moon shining over the amber colored leaves; the yard was a masterpiece of silvers and golds and coppers. Mother Nature was at her finest and surely God had made this place just for her. The night brought her peace like nothing else could. It was her very own little piece of heaven. And yet, it wasn’t heaven while she stood there alone. Traci looked up at the silver blue moon and let out her breath in exasperation. I’m so lonely. Isn’t there anybody out there who will take me away from this humiliating existence!
It was a silent plea she found that she was unable to keep from thinking when she woke in the night. Someone was out there for her. She would wait until her husband got his new job and the pressure was off of him and then tell him it was over. She just couldn’t live this way. It wasn’t in her heart to be selfish and demand a lot from him. She just wanted what she thought she and her children needed. Traci wanted better for her children than a father who worked and went to bed. Sometimes she wandered if he was being unfaithful to her. They hadn’t been intimate in any way for months. He worked for the government. Doing what, hell, she didn’t know? Don had worked very hard to get where he was now, but the sacrifices didn’t justify the means. To Traci, they didn’t, anyway. Their life didn’t use to be like this. Every time she brought up the subject he told her she was just being paranoid and should stop worrying about those things. But something wouldn’t quit gnawing at her and she learned very young to listen to her inner warning system. That same feeling had kept her alive and many of her patients as well.
The moon was a strange blue tonight. Devyn had been restless this night and wandered the land with supernatural speed. Something was pulling him, compelling him. Centuries had gone by and he had never felt such a compulsion. Not until a few weeks ago and it was every night since then. It was a loneliness that closely matched his own. A deep empty void. He had to find what was filling the night with such pain.
Devyn had been in search of prey when he felt the call tonight. The nights had become as one long endless night. Every century that went by the world made more changes, but with everything new it had all been done before. Not the technologies of course, but people were people and very little about the species had changed. After all, he had been human once. He had a wife and child once. He had loved and felt things once. That was why he now found himself searching for something he couldn’t put into words. Feelings so deep he couldn’t ignore them. And he was getting closer with every night.
After his kind lived for more than a century or two they began to grow bitter and power hungry. He was not any better and he was very old. Devyn had fought many nights with others of his race for the supremacy of their pecking order. He had only found small joys in winning. This was not the life he had ever wanted and had searched up until the last hundred years for a meaning to his life, for someone to love and some one to love him. These last ten years or so his hope had completely left him and he turned to ruling the dark kingdom. And was very close to his goal, only the wizards were yet to bow to his authority.
The night was nearly gone and he would have to find hotel accommodations. The pull was very strong now and he was going to need his strength if he was to end his search tomorrow. And Devyn was determined to find what he was searching for before the next dawn. His powers were not as strong during the day and he couldn’t afford to fall into one of the wizards traps.
He came thundering down from the sky without a sound and landed in front of an old inn. Rest was something he needed badly and he didn’t have the comfort of his home land’s soil to rest above. This would have to do. At least he had fed well this night and would not be so drained by the sun that he would not be able to hear the strange call should it come again.
The old man at the desk had been quite indifferent as to Devyn’s specific needs. He gave Devyn a room in which the morning sun wouldn’t seep into the room. No doubt the old man thought that it was simply that he would sleep better in a dark room. No matter, the sun wouldn’t deplete him of his strength while he rested and maybe he wouldn’t have to feed upon this rising so he could continue his search. Devyn knew he was getting closer. But to what? It didn’t feel like a trap, but then again it didn’t feel like anything he’d ever felt before. Anything different was worth exploring, especially now.
Seven thirty in the morning and the alarm echoed in her pounding head. Traci reached over to turn it off. Don was already gone, to work no doubt. But there was doubt. Oh, she could just kick herself for sounding like a silly teenage girl. She wasn’t even out of bed and there she was accusing. Maybe Don was right? Maybe, she just was feeling insecure because he was gone more now? He is under a lot of stress and that explains his lack of libido and his need for extra sleep. Upset with herself, Traci headed off to take a hot shower and try to feel normal. That’s what it was; they just both needed more rest. After all having a six year old girl and a four year old boy on top of having already stressful careers was exhausting. It was just that simple. They would work things out like they always did and she would have her happily ever after. Her moonlight sessions with a glass of wine were taking their toll on her mentality.
The water was hot and steamy and she dropped the robe carelessly on the floor and stepped in. Hot was good; steamy was good and it was what she needed to clear the cobwebs of sleep from her mind. After applying the conditioner to her hair, Traci stood with her back to the water and let it cascade over her bare back. Water was wonderful for soothing tension. She just might have to get herself a hot tub like Dena had suggested. It’s not like she didn’t have the money. With that she laughed. Never in her wildest dreams did she think that she would ever be anything but poor and abused. Why would she even think about giving that up because Don was gone more often than usual? During the night it all seems so clear, but during the day light it was hard to understand why she was feeling as she did. Traci was practical. After all she was a respected nurse and professor. Deciding it must be one too many of those lifetime movies she was watching, Traci rinsed the conditioner out of her hair and stepped out of the shower. She didn’t have too much time to get dressed and take the kids to school and daycare. Her day was going to be ever so busy and she wasn’t going to let it get the better of her.
Down stairs, Dena had already let herself in. She and Antwan were already cooking breakfast for Traci and the lot of them.
“Mornin’ beautiful.”
“Hey, Antwan. Dena, you two really need to quit playing Nanny. It’s not that I don’t appreciate it…it’s just…”
“It’s just what? You don’t want to visit with your two best friends over coffee before work?”
Traci sighed aloud. They knew what she was about to say and the conversation that would take place, yet again. They would bait the hook and she would always bite, like a good little fish. If only they hadn’t known each other from practically the beginnings of their lives…Not she would have it any other way.
“So, what? You want me and Dena to leave?” God, did Antwan really have to look like such a sad little puppy when he wanted his way?
“It’s just that Don thinks I don’t need to have people over all the time. He said if I needed the help we could hire a house keeper or a cook or something. I don’t think he understands that we’re just so close we’re practically family, ya know?” Okay, so she was pleading with them in a way to keep the same “talk” from taking place yet once again. By the looks on their faces, Traci figured it hadn’t done any good.
“Oh, so Don thinks that we’re your servants. I see.”
“You know, Trace, I don’t think he wants you to have friends. He made you stop with the tutoring you were doing because you spent too much time with students. You had to drop out of the PTA because he thought you were being too intrusive with the kids schooling. You even had to stop going to that Bible study that you started with the pastor’s wife…do you even still go to that Church anymore?”
“Stop it! I did quit but, it was only because it was putting stress on our marriage by way of my being gone so much, okay?! We don’t get to spend a lot of time with each other and it has required some personal sacrifices.”
“Yeah, yours.”
“Uh-hum…what exactly has he had to sacrifice…I mean besides having sex with his wife.”
“Dena! That’ll be quite enough! …Look, I’ve got to get the kids up. I don’t want you guys to leave me okay…just wait here till I get the kids up and to school and we can talk.” Traci had just taken a big bite of bait just like a good little fish. Hook, line, and sinker. It didn’t matter what they said really. She always wanted them around and had told Don as much. He had been totally pissed off and told her to loose them. It was the one thing she was firm about with him. Dena and Antwan were the only family she had, even if they weren’t blood. The one concession she had made with Don was that she’d ask them to ease up on the visiting. Though, what did it matter? He was never around to see that they were here anyway.
Sighing once again, Traci made her way up the stairs to the children’s rooms. To her amazement they were both up and nearly dressed. Her little angels! Tamara and Matthew were her one ray of sunshine this morning. Tam was getting to be a real pro at dressing herself and had helped Matt get dressed as well. That is, unless her four year old had figured out how to tie his shoes during the night.
“Wow! You guys look great. Good job, are we ready to go to school?”
“We’re hungry Momma. I smelled the bacon and now my tummy smells it too.”
“Well, we have to hurry up then if we’re going to eat before we leave. It’s getting late. Maybe we can make a plate to go? How’s that?” Tam looked stricken. She loved sitting with Dena and Antwan in the morning and eating breakfast with her little brother. Traci could see her fighting tears but, she was such a good selfless girl.
“Okay Momma but, can I have Dena make mine up?” Traci was touched beyond words. She would never comply with Don’s request now. Dena and Antwan were just as much a joy to her children as they were to her.
She grabbed up both the kids and their bags and raced down stairs after hugging the poor things to death.
If they wanted to sit a few minutes with Dena and Antwan then, by God, they could. She’d just talk with their teacher and have them excused for being a little late. It was one thing to have her own joy stolen from her but; she wouldn’t steal that joy from her children.
“Okay, kids…we’ll eat before we go. And if we’re late then we’re late and I’ll talk with your teachers okay.” Yeah, they were okay.
“…The biggest thing to remember is that most people know they should be taking extra precautions when it’s hot out. The fact is simply that most people do not use their knowledge and follow through. It’s simple enough to prevent but, once you’ve passed the heat exhaustion stage a stroke is imminent and requires immediate medical attention as it can result in death.
“Heat cramps, Heat exhaustion, and Heat stroke…I want a six page paper on the hows, the why’s, and the best course of action for each. If you wish you can create a scenario as long as you meet all of the guide lines I’ve listed on the hand out. It’s due in two weeks. We are having the test next week and I’ll give the review when we meet next. The only bonus I will give, before any of you ask, is a ten point bonus for turning in your paper on test day instead of the week after. Any questions?...
“Okay, I’ll see you day after tomorrow.”
Traci was glad to see them all go. She was also very glad that they had not asked any questions. Her mind had been so distracted all day and while it was easy to recite a lecture, answering questions required her total concentration. Especially with some of the brilliant ones in her class and she used that word loosely. She just hoped that she’d never have one of them trying to administer first aid on her. It crossed her mind that she would have better luck just waiting for the ambulance to arrive than to chance it with these future medics. Traci was going to have to really drill it into their heads if they were going to pass. So far only a hand full of her students could properly perform CPR and the Heimlich maneuver. It would be better if she had them for more than twice a week but, that was what college was all about. The work must come from the student. Professors only had to present the information in an understandable way.
As she began to grade her morning class’s pop quiz, Traci heard her cell phone ring. The thought crossed her mind to just turn the damn thing off but, she knew who was calling. All the more reason to ignore it, you twit.
“Hello.”
“Are you planning on coming home at a reasonable hour tonight?”
“What, no ‘I love you, dear’ or ‘how are things going’?” Oh yeah, this was going to be one hell of a fight. Why did she always have to make it worse?
“Look, I got a call from the school to come pick up the kids…”
“Oh, no! Wait right there buddy. This is your day to pick them up. You know that. This is my late class and I won’t be home for another hour. Don’t blame your forgetfulness on me. I do what is required.” Shit, let’s just dig a deeper hole while we’re at it. Traci’s mouth was going to get her killed one day.
“…You know I don’t have time to take off for that kind of thing and..”
“That kind of thing! That thing would be your children. I didn’t make them by myself and you will make time for them. So, go pick them up! You can yell at me all you want to later but, I am at work and I will not…will not be spoken to like this. I’ve had this job for a couple of years now and this has always been my late night so there is really no excuse for you’re forgetting about your children! Good-bye.”
Oh yeah, it was going to be a fun night. Dena and Antwan were right. Don is just picking fights now. This was totally absurd and Traci couldn’t put up with it any longer. New job or not she was going to lay it out on the line…Tonight. She couldn’t live with a man like him any longer, the man he had become. Screw it! I can grade this shit at home later but, right now…I’m going out for a drink. The bastard! Those are his children too and it’s the only time they get to see him really. He doesn’t fucking care. Well, it’ll be the last time he has to be put out by “spending the evening” with them. He’ll be spending the evening elsewhere.
Pulling into the parking, Traci wondered what she was doing. She should be going home and…and doing what? Fighting with Don, was what. She could do that later and besides, Dena and Antwan kept telling her she needed to check out this new club. Hindered, who was coming up with these names?
Well, she was here. It was all she could do to make herself get out of the car and the walk to the entrance was laced with apprehension. What is Don going to think when I come home smelling like alcohol?
That was it! It was time she stopped thinking about Don. He sure as HELL wasn’t thinking about her or her kids. So what if she wanted to have a couple of drinks before she came home and had the biggest fight next to WWII? She was an adult. He had come home smelling like more than just alcohol before. Which is why she was having her doubts about his loyalty and commitment in the first place! Besides, it wasn’t as if she was there picking some guy up. She didn’t think like that. Traci wondered if Don thought like that or not? Damn it!
Okay, that is the last time she would allow herself to think about him until she went home. There was still a good forty-five minutes before she would normally head home. Once there, Traci was certain, she would have her fill of Don…perhaps more than her fill.
The club wasn’t too crowded, though most of the partiers wouldn’t show up until at least ten or so. Antwan and Dena were right. This place was nice, very nice. There was a dance hall but, it was at the opposite end of the club. The front of it was more or less a pretty classy bar. Very sophisticated. The lighting was just dim enough and there wasn’t the smoky haze that is usually present in most bars. Then again, glancing around the room, it might be that none of the smokers have shown up yet. She couldn’t imagine that any bar or club would have a “no-smoking” policy. (That would not attract many customers.) It was very roomy as well. True, Traci hadn’t been to many bars…at all! but, those she’d seen were “Red-neck” at best.
In front of her stood a very young and very handsome bartender dressed to the nine’s…bow tie and all! He glanced at her a few times and patiently waited for her to settle herself. God, she felt so old! Twenty-five with two children tended to tack on the years. Boy, she did need a drink!
“So…what can I DO for you tonight?” He was flirting! It actually allowed her to relax a bit more. It was nice to be flirted with and pampered. No wonder her friends wanted her to have a night out so bad.
“Just a Long Island Tea, if you can make it not too strong.”
“I can do it anyway you like it, sweet!”
And with that he started flipping around bottles and causing a lot of commotion. Though, it was a spectacular display of manliness, even if she did say so herself. Traci had been so sheltered as far as the “fun” things in life. She was not naive as some might imply but, she was lost when it came to letting loose.
That wasn’t one of her priorities when she found a way to get through school and get out of the slum she grew up in. She was more concerned with making it in life than in “making it” with the skins who wandered the streets or the so called “In” crowd.
That was probably why she fell so hard for Don. They met when she was in college. It had seemed as if he had it all together even back in those days. He had wonderful credit and was very sensible with money. Don had helped her with her finances. He was a genius at budgeting and didn’t mind sharing his secrets with her. It was infatuation, pure and simple.
They had spent many a night studying together at the library and dreaming about their future together. Don talked about their buying a house and getting married. She would work up to a respectable position in her field and he would reach the top of his. They would never have to worry about money again! It all seemed so wonderful back then. Traci went along for the ride and took his advice from A to Z. There should have been red flags waving back then. Don was a little too together. Traci had been a little too eager to heed his advice, come to think of it. It had been Don’s dreams that they were living and yet it didn’t seem as if it was a “good” dream at this point.
It didn’t matter. Traci could not quit thinking about him…them. Avoiding things was something she would just never be any good at. Fight or not she would finish her drink and go home. Part of her wanted everything to work out and for them to put all of this non-sense behind them. The other part was screaming that she deserved better and needed better. Part of her whispered to her at night of some one who would sweep her away and give her…what? What did she want anyway?
Love, devotion, compassion...attention, is that so much to ask?
Not a good sign. Don’s car wasn’t in the drive way or the garage. Traci was desperately trying not to panic. Would he have run off with the kids? It seemed highly unlikely. Something was wrong though…she could feel it. Almost touch it.
Who knows, maybe he had taken the kids to his mother’s house to try and scare her. That was just as unlikely as the first thought. Don was, if nothing else, a creature of habit and he didn’t like other people breaking his routine. Fighting had become fairly routine for them and it wasn’t like him to run off to avoid one.
The door was locked and all of the lights were out. So they hadn’t been home yet or one of the kids would have left their room lights on. Maybe he had gone to his Mother’s house. Well, at least she knew that the kids would get a decent meal over there. Traci had an average relationship with her In-laws. As in, the grandchildren were their world, their son could do no wrong, and they made polite conversation with her. Still, it was more of a family than she had ever known.
Traci hung up her coat and keys then strolled up the stairs to her bedroom. A shower…or better yet, a hot bath! That’s what she needed. A nice, long, hot bath. God, what she wouldn’t do to be able to have the opportunity more often!
She glanced at the phone and thought about checking the voice mail but, decided that whatever Don had to say could be heard after her bath. There was a feeling of drastic change that she couldn’t shake. The thought of a bath gave her hope that she could rinse away that feeling…that foreboding ache. With that thought, Traci headed towards the bathroom. They did after all have a huge tub. Why didn’t she use it more often? God only knows she has enough bathe-salt to start her own store.
The water felt so good. Traci sat there letting the conditioning treatment set in her hair and thinking. Yes, this was the end. There would be no more them…no more Don. No more excuses and silly explanations to the children about why their father couldn’t (more over wouldn’t) make it to their important events. It would be sad for her babies but, together they would work through it. Her babies were strong and smart. They deserved better too.
Time had passed so quickly that Traci hadn’t even notice her bath had gone cold. Toweling off and throwing on some PJ’s she stole up her strength and picked up the phone.
The sun had only been down for a few hours now but, Devyn had been up far longer. He’d felt it again. That strange ache and loneliness and something else. It was so strong that he dressed and headed out in the daylight.
Lore had it that a vampire could not go out in the sun without meeting their deaths. This was not so and yet it is. During the day they are like mortals and are depleted of their strength. The young ones can indeed meet their deaths in the suns rays for they have no strength to spare. It is only the older and more powerful of their kind whom can walk in the light. Not such a gift though as they were comparably likened to an old man! Though given his powers and abilities Devyn was pretty sure he was more comparable to a thirty to forty year old. Not so many vampires could boast as much.
The feeling was strong and yet with the day light beating down on him he was not able to home in on it. Frustrated, Devyn wandered about the city HOPING that he might happen upon the source. Yet, the sun was now set and he was still wandering. And wondering. What the Hell was wrong with him? He was chasing a feeling?! Though, what else did he have to do? Century after century and well, it had to be boredom. And loneliness? To Hell with that, he wasn’t lonely! Devyn needed no one. He was simply making sure that this, this…feeling wasn’t a trap of some sort. Then when he was sure that everything was right or after taking care of the problem, which ever the case may be, he would leave.
For now Devyn needed to restore some of his strength. The sun had definitely taken its toll on him. Yes, and he wouldn’t have enough strength to continue his search if he didn’t “refill” so to speak.
With that Devyn dropped down in front of what appeared to be a very active club. Very nice. He would be able to have his fill and be in and out faster than a drive-through. Or maybe he would find him a couple of sexy young ones to play with for the night. Ah, so much depended on his moods lately…but, if the mood struck him…well, no one had refused yet, or was able to refuse was more to the point.
“You have twenty-eight messages…” God, apparently it was going to be a HUGE fight. Traci took a deep breath and played the first message.
“This is Jane with Gentle Valley Hospital, uhm…I am trying to get hold of Mrs. Davis. There has been an accident and…” The phone fell from her hand. An ACCIDENT. The word seemed to float in front of her eyes and she felt her stomach knot before she retched. Twenty-eight messages…Twenty-eight of them! They had been trying to reach her for a while. While she was out having a drink and thinking about divorce! The guilt made her limbs feel heavy and filled her chest with an awful aching.
She couldn’t even think about hearing the rest of the message, couldn’t. It took everything in her to hang up the phone and dress to head to the hospital. She was sure they would explain there. Where was Don? Was it the kids? God, she needed to listen to the rest of the messages but, couldn’t. She heard herself sobbing as she drove down town but, she couldn’t feel anything at that point. Whatever happened…it was her fault.
Thank God, for parking attendants. She had been against the hospital using them because of the cost but, at this moment they were keeping her from having her car towed.
She could now fill the tension building. Traci knew instinctively it was bad…She always knew. Her pace turned from a mild rush to a full force run through the doors up to the front of the check in line in the ER.
“Ma’am, I’m sorry to interrupt but, I got a call. Something about an accident, I…didn’t get all of the message. I’m…I’m Mrs. Davis. Can you send me to where I need to be? Please…” It was the note in her voice that kept the registration nurse from sending her to the back of the line. Traci waited patiently as the nurse checked the computer. It seemed like an eternity though; it only took a few seconds before the nurse looked up at her with a grim face.
Traci’s heart beat stopped and her breath caught. The nurse told her to go up to CCU on the Third floor. That they would explain everything to her when she got up there and they were waiting for her.
Even the elevators took too long and seemed to take years off of her life as well. It wasn’t even a relief when the doors slowly opened and she saw her In-laws sitting in the CCU lobby outside the locked doors. They immediately noticed her get off the elevator. And how could they not? The doors practically opened to throw her on their lap. And to her horror she didn’t see the children. Things were building to a horrific pitch in her mind as things started adding up. Then, even better, Don’s Mother rose and took a step towards her.
SMACK!
Traci was totally caught off guard as her Mother-in-law slapped her cheek, HARD.
“You stupid little whore! We aren’t allowed in to see Tamara and because of you Don and Matthew are GONE!” She started shaking and nearly fell. Probably would have if Don’s father hadn’t been right there helping her to her seat.
Gone. Gone? She’d used the word gone. Surely she was over playing the drama of the moment just like she always did. Matthew? Where’s Tamara? Traci looked at the doors to CCU and knew that’s where. Mat couldn’t be gone. She wouldn’t believe it. Don’s family was the kind to exaggerate to get the point across. They were manipulative bastards but, Traci couldn’t see even how her Mother-in-law would say something like that about her “precious” son. But she wouldn’t allow herself to think about them, him. She wouldn’t let panic rule her, not just yet anyway. Not until she knew for certain what had happened.
Her breathing was tight and short as she punched the intercom and was escorted through the doors. She didn’t turn to see but, she could feel the heated stares on her as she walked through. It was almost like a dream. It had to be a dream, a really horrible nightmare and she would wake up. Wake up, damn it! She would wake up and have to tell Dana and Tyrone about this horrific dream.
As she approached the front desk an elderly nurse came around to Traci’s side and motioned for her to sit. The nurse pulled up a chair and sat next to her with such compassion and sorrow that Traci knew it was bad. She knew this wasn’t a dream and she could hear herself screaming in her mind.
“Mrs. Davis, I’m not sure how to tell you this. I wanted to sit down with you before we go any further and explain what’s happened. I’m Jane Travis, the charge nurse. Did you get my messages?” Somehow Traci knew it was the lady on the phone. Traci didn’t respond for a moment and tried to gather enough strength to speak. Her would was shattering.
“I got as far as the word accident…and, then I rushed right over.” She felt herself go pale and her stomach was turning again. She had to ask though, she had to know.
“I saw my Mother-in-law in the waiting room.” She met the nurse’s eyes as her own were brimming with tears and continued. “She said that Don and Ma…Matthew were…” God, help her. She couldn’t even finish the question as a sob wrenched through her whole body and she had to fight hard to not to throw up again.
The nurse put a hand on her shoulder.
“Why don’t you let me explain?” Traci only nodded afraid to make eye contact.
“Your husband and children were involved in a car accident. Apparently there was a drunken driver who ran into a semi. The truck-driver tried to correct but, ended up tipping over…” Her gaze washed over Traci with such deep anguish and compassion that Traci knew what was coming next. Her chest was aching like part of her soul was being torn from her. “It nearly flattened two cars. One of them was your husbands…I’m sorry to say that he and your son died instantly. Your daughter was trapped until rescuers were able to tear her out. She’s in pretty bad shape but, she is alive. I want you to look at me. She is alive. She’s breathing on her own but, we have her on oxygen. The ordeal threw her into shock and we’ve not been able to get her out of it. We’re afraid she might slip into a coma.”
Devyn felt it then, stirring and calling him with such violent force he nearly killed the woman her was feeding on. More than that he felt pain. Bitter, heart-wrenching pain. The pull was so strong he was able to latch onto the direction. Without regard for his prey he dropped the woman and shot himself up towards the night sky. His need right then was to find the source of this, thing.
He kept his focus on the strange pulling. It was necessary at that moment to be at the center of the call. It was a need. Devyn had to be there and to end this search. He would be much happier once his search had ended and he could get on with his life.
Stopping in mid sky, Devyn had found the center of the call. He was at a hospital. Rather out of place in this small town, he thought. It was an easy eight story building that was nearly as wide as it was high. He circled it a few times before he landed at the back of the building. Having fed well, he was able to cloak himself from prying eyes and walked straight on into the ER.
Devyn nearly uncloaked and gave away his position when he was assaulted the strong smell of fresh blood and fear. Ah, he had thrived on fear for so long. Mixed with blood, it was an addicting drug. It took a moment to remind himself just why he was there…and it wasn’t to torment already broken humans. And so he slipped into the elevator as it was closing. If it meant he was going to have to do a floor by floor search then that’s exactly what he would do.
The elevator opened to the second floor. Lazily, Devyn strode through the halls until he got to the south hall. The pull was so powerful but, it wasn’t on this floor. He was certain and that could only mean that it, whatever it was, was on the next level right above him. Not bothering with the elevators, he made his way to the stares with supernatural speed.
Once on the floor Devyn had to work hard to stay cloaked. His chest was heavy with sorrow and his limbs felt leaden. His mind was on over drive trying to figure out if this was some type of trap. If so, it was damn good.
Halfway down the hall he came upon the source of his torments. Devyn sucked in his breath. His torment lay over a very battered and still child, sobbing. He was compelled to go closer.
She was tall for a woman and yet not as tall as him. Her hair was a beautiful shade of gold. Peculiar how it was blonde and red at the same time but richly deep and silky. Devyn couldn’t help but watch as the two long braids she had it in kept falling forward and then being propelled back hitting her firm bottom. He could see muscle definition under her soft curves. He was drinking her in. She had freckles like sand on her shoulders that gave her some type of exotic quality he couldn’t describe. And she kept wiping tears from her face.
Her face, he wasn’t able to get a good look at it from his vantage point. Devyn found that he had to look at it. Though he was sure it was angelic as she was an angel sent to tempt him.
There was no taint of a wizard or lycanthrop and she wasn’t a vampire but, he felt a power flowing from her every pore. Somehow he had to meet her, speak to her. Touch her. And now, Devyn had a scent and a face…he could bide his time. That is if the sorrow he felt didn’t tear him in two before then.
Standing there looking at her little girl so battered and broken, Traci just cried. She couldn’t stop the tears from falling. It didn’t matter who saw her crying now, nothing mattered but her little Tamara.
This was all her fault! If she had just given in and picked up the kids at school, maybe none of this would have happened. Maybe then she’d still be able to hold her little boy in her arms and smell his soft, sweet hair. She remembered his smell, his laugh. It hurt to think about his smiling eyes. If he could look at her now…what would be in those eyes? Blame? Yes, blame…it’s what was engulfing her and taking away her breath.
Traci couldn’t think about her lifeless little boy any more. Instead she focused her energy on her little daughter who was slipping away as she sat there. God, she was so helpless! How can she loose both her babies? The tears welled up in her swollen eyes once again and spilled over her red cheeks. She hasn’t lost her baby girl, yet. Not yet and she wouldn’t if she could help it.
Open your eyes, baby. Please! You’ve got to wake up. Don’t leave me…
As she sat there praying to God to save her child a little portly nurse came in the room. Traci moved out of the way as to let the nurse check Tamara’s vital signs and empty her catheter. It was touching to hear the nurse talking to Tamara and telling her what she was doing.
“She can hear us, you know.”
“Do you really believe that?” Traci’s voice shook with another bout of hysteria brought on by this disaster.
“Oh, yes ma'm. I know she can. You can see on the monitors the brain activity when she’s spoken too.” The old nurse looked Traci over with such sympathy and pulled up a chair next to the bed and sat.
“Hun, you look like you’re about to pass out. Go get you something to eat at the cafeteria and I’ll sit here with your girl and chart.” She handed Traci a little punch card and explained it was for the families of patients so they would be provided with free meals while they stayed with the patients.
“Now go on…you’re not doing your daughter any good in the state you’re in. Get some food and a cup of coffee and I’ll stay with her ‘till you come back.”
“Thank you.”
Traci was thankful for the little, chubby old nurse for being so kind to her. She was even more thankful that her in-laws were gone. It had been hours since she’d been there and yet it still seemed like she just walked in to find out about the…accident. Her stomach had been tied in knots but, now she had to admit that she was getting hungry.
The guilt still ate at her. Nothing she did made it go away. This all could have been avoided had she not gotten so upset with Don. Had she not tried to make a point and been so damn stubborn! Had she thought a little more of her kids than making her dead beat husband do his part! Had she been a better Mother!
The tears fell again and suddenly her plate of food didn’t smell so good. In fact, her stomach was twisting again and turning and she had to get up…she needed some air.
He’d been watching the woman for hours now and became excited as she left the small room in ICU. Devyn followed her down to the cafeteria and still he waited. Everything seemed so strange and he could not help but wait for the trap to be set. Nothing. Now, he was just waiting for the right opportunity to approach the woman. Though, what would he say to her? One did not just approach a human woman and tell her that he’d been tracking her for months now. Oh, and by the way, I’m a vampire. Yeah, he could see that going over real well.
As he was turning it over in his mind, the woman suddenly bolted up and looked as if she were about to go into a sprint. Instinctively, Devyn was behind her and he found his hand on her shoulder before he was able to come to his senses.
The woman whirled around and met his steady gaze. His breath slammed out of him as he finally got a good look at her face. She was Heaven to his Hell. Her jaw was defined and yet very sensual, very feminine. She had huge grey eyes that reminded him of silver pools. They were puffy and swollen, no doubt from all the crying he had watched her do. His gaze fell to her lips and he felt his mouth moisten. They were full but thin and very sexy. She looked so sorrowful that his chest tightened as she stared into his cold black eyes. It took him a moment to even find his voice.
“Do you mind if I sit with you?”
Traci just stared at the man. She knew him didn’t she? She was about to loose it again when he seemingly appeared out of nowhere. There hadn’t been anyone in the cafeteria with her except the staff, had there? That was it. She was just loosing her sanity. Traci hadn’t felt like company but, maybe she needed the distraction.
“No, I don’t mind. I’m Traci…and you are?”
“Devyn, Devyn McGregor. I’m not interrupting your dinner am I?”
“Huh?...oh, uhm…No, I was just a little spooked I guess. This place is quiet and empty at night and I’m not used to being alone. I guess I could use some company.” Her face turned bright red. She could feel the color in her cheeks. Traci was feeling a little silly now that she was talking. He probably thought she was a babbling idiot but, she couldn’t bring herself to care at that point. Any company was good company if it wasn’t her in-laws and she couldn’t face her friends yet. God, she hadn’t even called them yet! What would she even tell them? Would they blame her…forgive her?
Devyn found he was intent on just listening to the sound of her voice. Beautiful. But, she seemed to fade in and out on him. Her eyes glossed over and started to fill with tears and his chest did that crunching thing again. She was distracted. It should have been evident by what he’d watched up stairs. That was her daughter in the hospital bed he had learned from the nurses. Of course she would be upset. This woman had just lost her son and husband and all that was left was her little daughter who was on the verge of a coma. Devyn couldn’t bring himself to be sorry for the loss of her husband and he cursed himself for the joy of knowing she was not tied to anyone.
What was even worse was his need to slip into her mind. It was taking all of his will power not to spy on her thoughts. Especially since her thoughts would take her over like they were now. He didn’t need to spy on her thoughts to feel the deep pain and sorrow she was feeling…and something more. Regret? Shame.
“Are you okay?” It was more than a compulsion it was a necessity as he took hold of her hand and just held it. She was so cold.
“Oh, uhm, yes, I’m okay. I’m fine.” He’d startled her. She was so absorbed in thought that she had forgotten he was there.
“I’ve really got to get back up stairs and check on my daughter. Really, thank you for sitting with me but…”
“Come outside and get some air with me first. I could use a cigarette. Do you smoke?” Devyn put a small compulsion in his voice so she would follow him. The sun would be coming up in a few hours and he wanted to spend a little more time with this woman before he rested.
“Just for a minute and them I really need to get back up to my daughter.”
The night was quite in this town and the air had a cold bite to it. Devyn noticed the woman was shivering. In one swift move he had draped his thick leather jacket over her shoulders. He realized just how small and helpless this woman really was standing next to one so powerful. Yet, he felt as if he’d do anything she wanted him to do. He had to know, was this one of the wizard’s traps? Devyn, as a general rule, didn’t socialize with the mortals. They were just a food supply if they were anything to him. Yet, when this woman, Traci, shivered, he felt compelled to warm her. When she cried he needed to comfort her. When he stood next to her, he didn’t feel empty.
“How long have you lived here…Traci?” He felt wickedly sensual when he rolled her name off of his tongue. He lit the cigarette and inhaled deeply before she answered.
“All of my life. I actually grew up in the next town over.” She’d stopped shivering in his jacket. God, it was so warm and felt so good…like he was holding her to him.
“Where are you from, Devyn, wasn’t it? You have some kind of an accent but, it’s not a southern one. I can usually tell them apart being southern myself.” He nodded.
“I’m from a little village in Scotland but, I’ve done a lot of traveling. I suppose that’s why my accent has faded.” It was mostly the truth. Traveling and living for as long as he had did have a way of smoothing off the rough Scottish brogue.
“Wow, I’ve got some Scottish blood. I’ve always wanted to visit there but, I never had the money. When I did have the money I didn’t have the time. If my baby girl gets better, I’m going to make the time.” Tears fell unchecked down her soft cheeks once again. Without thought, Devyn pulled her to him and kissed them away. She struggled for a moment but, as he just held her she went still. He sensed her needing to be held and found that he wanted to hold her just as much as she needed it.
Traci couldn’t find her voice and was struggling to breath. She didn’t like wanting to stay in his arms but, she liked it anyway. It was the first time she felt the pain and guilt ebb since she had gotten to the hospital. Selfish, yes, she knew it was selfish to want to forget her pain but, as she was finding out…Traci was very selfish. So, she laid her head to his chest and let herself drown in the silence of the early morning.
Finally, she was able to find her voice as the first rays of sunlight came over the horizon. Her voice was husky and rough to her ears.
“I really need to go check on my daughter now.”
“I know.”
“I…uh, I don’t want you to think that I just go throwing myself into strange men’s arms. I was just, I don’t know, overwhelmed is a good word for it.”
“I know.”
“Look, I want to thank you for talking to me. It’s just that I…” She couldn’t think with him staring at her that way. It felt like he was looking into her soul. As much as she hated herself for it…she liked the way he looked at her.
Devyn liked the way she squirmed under his gaze. It was some what of a treat to see a real reaction from a mortal. He could force her to do what he wanted and he wanted to taste those lips. Her bare neck was a temptation in and of itself. Yet, he tired of everyone bending to his will. More than that, it mattered to him whether or not she kissed him of her own will and not from his compulsion.
“I should be going myself.”
“Going?” There was almost a panic in her voice and he felt that twisting, aching in his chest again.
“I’ll be back tonight. We can talk over some coffee if you’d like?”
“Yes.”
“Go on then. I know you want to check on your daughter and I’ve kept you from it for far too long. I’m sorry. It’s just you looked like you needed a distraction. I’m very good at distracting beautiful ladies.”
His grin was sinful but, she smiled with him. Traci believed he very much was a distraction to any woman. His long black hair and dark sensual eyes were murder to any woman. Then you add his well shaped body…arms that are strong when he holds you and shoulders begging you to lay your head on them…yeah, he was a killer with the ladies. She didn’t even want to notice his ass. It took everything in her not to watch as he walked across the parking lot.
Yup, she was definitely a horrible person. She’d left her little daughter who was slipping away into a coma, alone for hours while she found comfort in a handsome stranger’s arms. What was wrong with her?!
As Traci stepped off of the elevator she realized she still had that man’s jacket. She was glad. It seemed to emanate heat of its own accord.
“Oh, there you are, hun. I’ve been checking in on your daughter. She’s got some color back in her cheeks and her vitals are good. I’ve got to get ready for shift change but, I’ll see you again tonight.”
“Thank you very much and I’m sorry I was gone for so long. I guess I needed some air more than I thought.”
“You look like it did you some good. The doctors will be coming up to check on her in a few hours and I imagine they’ll want to talk with you. If you need anything just ask, okay?”
“Thank you again, I will.”
Once the nurse had left, Traci took hold of Tamara’s hand and squeezed it.
“Tam, Tamara…Mommy’s here. Don’t leave me okay. I love you. I don’t know if you can hear me or not but, I’m sorry. I’m sorry for this happening but, I’m here now and we’ll make it through, okay. You’re strong and can come out of this. I…I miss you. I miss your brother and I’m so sorry, baby girl. It’s all my fault and I’ll never be able to make it up to you. I’m going to try to though…so come back to me. Please…I love you so much and you’re all I have left. You’re all that matters.” Traci glanced at the monitor and just like the nurse said, the brain waves were very active. She could even see her daughter’s eyes flutter and for a moment Traci held her breath. Please!
Nothing happened. The breath that she’d been holding came out in a low sob and she squeezed her daughter’s hand once more.
“You’re doing good, baby. Keep trying…keep trying and come back to me.”
The knocking on the door woke her, though Traci didn’t remember falling asleep. She wasn’t sure what to think of the group of doctors that walked in. Each of their name badges displayed their different specialties. It was the Neurologist who spoke first and told her what they’d been saying all of last night. She was in shock and if she didn’t pull out of it soon she’d slip into a coma.
God, what use were these people! She was a nurse herself and nothing they told her was new. It shouldn’t have surprised her. Yet, they instilled some hope in her. They were very optimistic because her brain waves were very active. They were hoping with a little physical therapy and coaxing that she’d snap out of it. It would begin that evening. A therapist would come in and move her legs and arms to keep up the muscle tone.
She was glad for the words of encouragement but, was happy to see them leave. Glancing at the clock, Traci sighed heavily. Dena and Antwan were probably worried out of their minds by now. There was no more putting it off; she had to call them. Really, she wanted to hear their voices. At least they were familiar voices and she needed that right now. What she really needed was to hear her daughter’s voice. Or wanted?
When she got off the phone with Dena, Traci slouched down on the couch. She had no more tears. She had no more strength or hope or anything. It was like she couldn’t even feel…she was completely empty. Her friend had offered to make the funeral arrangements for Matthew and Don and Traci didn’t object. It was rather a relief. Thinking about her dead little boy was just not an option at this point for her. And Don, well, she didn’t even want to think about it. It was just too much…way too much to swallow.
Without thinking she grabbed the leather jacket that she’d worn last night…that the stranger had left. Well, he wasn’t really a stranger anymore but, she still didn’t really know anything about him. She couldn’t shake the feeling that she knew him, though. No matter, it seemed of little importance and yet donning his jacket she felt alright. It was still warm. It must just be nerves. That has to be it. Her whole world had crumbled within the span of an evening and her nerves were wrecked. It was really no wonder. She was probably going into a kind of shock herself. Things just didn’t seem real.
Yet, when she looked at her tiny bruised daughter reality seemed to set in…HARD.
Traci pulled up the chair next to her daughter and sat once again. Feeling a little silly but, not caring, she started to sing to Tamara.
“Sing a song of six pence, a pocket full of rye, four and twenty black birds baked in a pie, when the pie was open the birds began to sing, wasn’t that a tasty dish to set before the king? The king was in his counting house, counting out his money, the Queen was in the parlor, eating bread and honey, the maid was in the garden hanging out the clothes, when a long came a black bird and snipped off her...”
“Noooosssssse”
Traci jumped up. Had she heard that? Was it her imagination? Please, God, don’t let it be my mind playing tricks on me!
“Tamara…baby, can you talk? Can you talk to Mommy? Please, say it again.” Holding her breath she stood there, afraid to even blink dare she miss it.
Nothing.
“Tamara, baby…please come back to Mommy. PLEASE, I love you.”
“I love…you.”
Tears spilled down Traci’s cheeks when she thought she had none left. She screamed for the nurses as she stared into her little girl’s beautiful eyes. Thank you, THANK YOU GOD!
Tamara tried to say more but, was wearing herself out with the effort. Traci just held her hand and stayed glued next to her as the nurses came in to evaluate her new condition. They were shining lights in her eyes and asking her all sorts of questions to which she was too exhausted to answer and could only nod. Finally, the nurses left and went to call the doctor. They were left alone in the room together.
“I’m…sleepy Momma.” Tamara’s voice sounded so weak and frail. It reminded Traci of an echo far away from them. God, she was back but, she was still so weak!
“I know, baby. I know but, you have to stay awake for a while, okay? We need to keep you awake so you don’t slip back into shock or worse. Momma’s been so worried about you.” Try as she might, Traci couldn’t keep the shake out of her voice. This was a miracle! She thought she had lost everything and now…her little girl was talking to her. It was too much of an emotional ride for one day.
“Momma?”
“Yes, baby girl.”
“Where is Matthew?” It didn’t surprise Traci that her daughter would be so worried about her little brother. That was her way. She’s always loved that about her daughter.
“Baby, I don’t know that this is the time…” She could see in her daughter’s gaze that she wouldn’t let it rest and something in her needed to know. She needed closure.
“He didn’t make it, baby. Neither did your Daddy. I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry. I should’ve picked you guys up. I should’ve…” Traci stopped short when her daughter grabbed hold of her hand and squeezed. She was a smart little girl. They sat in silence until the doctors came in to check on Tamara. Life had caught them both off guard. It was a hard lesson to learn for Traci…an even harder lesson for her six year old daughter.
Dena arrived at the hospital just before sunset. Traci was very glad to see her old friend and even more glad to see such a response out of her daughter. Tamara always thought of Dena as an aunt. Those two shared a special bond of mischief and Traci wouldn’t have had it any other way.
“I brought you something, stick pole.”
“What?” Tamara’s eyes sparkled with curiosity.
“I got you the whole set of Harry Potter books…well, what’s out so far, anyway. I thought since you’d be stuck here for a little while, you should have some good reading material.” She handed over the neatly wrapped box and the two of them tore into it. Paper flew everywhere and Traci couldn’t believe her ears as her young daughter and best friend giggled like teenage girls at a slumber party. It was very humbling, in deed.
“Traci, I’m going to stay and read to Tamara for a while. Why don’t you go home or head over to my place and take a shower. Get something to eat while you’re at it. You need a break, okay.”
“I really shouldn’t go. I mean, she just came back to us this morning and…”
“And you really need to take a shower.” Dena pulled Traci out in the hall, smiling at Tamara mischievously.
“Look, you need to get some rest and take a break. You have been through a lot, A LOT. Take a break tonight, okay. Just a few hours for yourself.”
“Dena, that’s how all of this happened! I took a few hours for myself yesterday…I’m to blame for all of this! I can’t leave her…I can’t.”
“Trace, girl, just listen to me, okay? At least go and take you a shower at my house and maybe a nap. You’re no good to your daughter in this condition. You can trust me with her.” Tears welled up and barely managed to keep from spilling over on Traci’s cheeks.
“I’ll only be gone long enough to take a shower and maybe get some clothes.”
Making her way through the parking lot, Traci realized she was still wearing that man’s jacket. Devyn. She was supposed to meet him for coffee! Spinning around she sprinted back towards the cafeteria entrance. She’d made it half way across the parking lot and then...SMACK!
The force in which she hit him nearly dropped her on her bottom. It probably would have had he not caught her and steadied her.
“I’m so sorry.” Her blush was from head to toe. She was so embarrassed. Here she was, a grown woman, sprinting across the hospital parking lot and running straight into the man she was going to meet. God, she was an idiot.
“What’s the rush? Nothing serious I hope.” He knew why she was running. It was the way she blushed. Devyn found that he loved that about her.
“Oh, nothing. I…” Okay, so what was she supposed to tell this guy? I was sprinting across the parking lot because I forgot I was supposed to meet with you tonight…and I didn’t want to stand you up.
“You wanna go get that coffee?” It was the best she could come up with. Better to throw them off guard with a question of your own than to fess up to being an idiot.
“Sure. It doesn’t have to be hospital coffee does it? Do you know any good coffee shops around here?”
“Oh, yes. My car’s just over this way.”
“This isn’t a very big town…I thought we could walk. If you don’t mind?” She looked both startled and pleased with the suggestion.
“O…Okay.”
With a heavy sigh, she walked out onto the patio. The night was beautiful! That was the one saving grace in her lonely existence; the nights in the country were welcoming. Especially in the fall with the moon shining over the amber colored leaves; the yard was a masterpiece of silvers and golds and coppers. Mother Nature was at her finest and surely God had made this place just for her. The night brought her peace like nothing else could. It was her very own little piece of heaven. And yet, it wasn’t heaven while she stood there alone. Traci looked up at the silver blue moon and let out her breath in exasperation. I’m so lonely. Isn’t there anybody out there who will take me away from this humiliating existence!
It was a silent plea she found that she was unable to keep from thinking when she woke in the night. Someone was out there for her. She would wait until her husband got his new job and the pressure was off of him and then tell him it was over. She just couldn’t live this way. It wasn’t in her heart to be selfish and demand a lot from him. She just wanted what she thought she and her children needed. Traci wanted better for her children than a father who worked and went to bed. Sometimes she wandered if he was being unfaithful to her. They hadn’t been intimate in any way for months. He worked for the government. Doing what, hell, she didn’t know? Don had worked very hard to get where he was now, but the sacrifices didn’t justify the means. To Traci, they didn’t, anyway. Their life didn’t use to be like this. Every time she brought up the subject he told her she was just being paranoid and should stop worrying about those things. But something wouldn’t quit gnawing at her and she learned very young to listen to her inner warning system. That same feeling had kept her alive and many of her patients as well.
The moon was a strange blue tonight. Devyn had been restless this night and wandered the land with supernatural speed. Something was pulling him, compelling him. Centuries had gone by and he had never felt such a compulsion. Not until a few weeks ago and it was every night since then. It was a loneliness that closely matched his own. A deep empty void. He had to find what was filling the night with such pain.
Devyn had been in search of prey when he felt the call tonight. The nights had become as one long endless night. Every century that went by the world made more changes, but with everything new it had all been done before. Not the technologies of course, but people were people and very little about the species had changed. After all, he had been human once. He had a wife and child once. He had loved and felt things once. That was why he now found himself searching for something he couldn’t put into words. Feelings so deep he couldn’t ignore them. And he was getting closer with every night.
After his kind lived for more than a century or two they began to grow bitter and power hungry. He was not any better and he was very old. Devyn had fought many nights with others of his race for the supremacy of their pecking order. He had only found small joys in winning. This was not the life he had ever wanted and had searched up until the last hundred years for a meaning to his life, for someone to love and some one to love him. These last ten years or so his hope had completely left him and he turned to ruling the dark kingdom. And was very close to his goal, only the wizards were yet to bow to his authority.
The night was nearly gone and he would have to find hotel accommodations. The pull was very strong now and he was going to need his strength if he was to end his search tomorrow. And Devyn was determined to find what he was searching for before the next dawn. His powers were not as strong during the day and he couldn’t afford to fall into one of the wizards traps.
He came thundering down from the sky without a sound and landed in front of an old inn. Rest was something he needed badly and he didn’t have the comfort of his home land’s soil to rest above. This would have to do. At least he had fed well this night and would not be so drained by the sun that he would not be able to hear the strange call should it come again.
The old man at the desk had been quite indifferent as to Devyn’s specific needs. He gave Devyn a room in which the morning sun wouldn’t seep into the room. No doubt the old man thought that it was simply that he would sleep better in a dark room. No matter, the sun wouldn’t deplete him of his strength while he rested and maybe he wouldn’t have to feed upon this rising so he could continue his search. Devyn knew he was getting closer. But to what? It didn’t feel like a trap, but then again it didn’t feel like anything he’d ever felt before. Anything different was worth exploring, especially now.
Seven thirty in the morning and the alarm echoed in her pounding head. Traci reached over to turn it off. Don was already gone, to work no doubt. But there was doubt. Oh, she could just kick herself for sounding like a silly teenage girl. She wasn’t even out of bed and there she was accusing. Maybe Don was right? Maybe, she just was feeling insecure because he was gone more now? He is under a lot of stress and that explains his lack of libido and his need for extra sleep. Upset with herself, Traci headed off to take a hot shower and try to feel normal. That’s what it was; they just both needed more rest. After all having a six year old girl and a four year old boy on top of having already stressful careers was exhausting. It was just that simple. They would work things out like they always did and she would have her happily ever after. Her moonlight sessions with a glass of wine were taking their toll on her mentality.
The water was hot and steamy and she dropped the robe carelessly on the floor and stepped in. Hot was good; steamy was good and it was what she needed to clear the cobwebs of sleep from her mind. After applying the conditioner to her hair, Traci stood with her back to the water and let it cascade over her bare back. Water was wonderful for soothing tension. She just might have to get herself a hot tub like Dena had suggested. It’s not like she didn’t have the money. With that she laughed. Never in her wildest dreams did she think that she would ever be anything but poor and abused. Why would she even think about giving that up because Don was gone more often than usual? During the night it all seems so clear, but during the day light it was hard to understand why she was feeling as she did. Traci was practical. After all she was a respected nurse and professor. Deciding it must be one too many of those lifetime movies she was watching, Traci rinsed the conditioner out of her hair and stepped out of the shower. She didn’t have too much time to get dressed and take the kids to school and daycare. Her day was going to be ever so busy and she wasn’t going to let it get the better of her.
Down stairs, Dena had already let herself in. She and Antwan were already cooking breakfast for Traci and the lot of them.
“Mornin’ beautiful.”
“Hey, Antwan. Dena, you two really need to quit playing Nanny. It’s not that I don’t appreciate it…it’s just…”
“It’s just what? You don’t want to visit with your two best friends over coffee before work?”
Traci sighed aloud. They knew what she was about to say and the conversation that would take place, yet again. They would bait the hook and she would always bite, like a good little fish. If only they hadn’t known each other from practically the beginnings of their lives…Not she would have it any other way.
“So, what? You want me and Dena to leave?” God, did Antwan really have to look like such a sad little puppy when he wanted his way?
“It’s just that Don thinks I don’t need to have people over all the time. He said if I needed the help we could hire a house keeper or a cook or something. I don’t think he understands that we’re just so close we’re practically family, ya know?” Okay, so she was pleading with them in a way to keep the same “talk” from taking place yet once again. By the looks on their faces, Traci figured it hadn’t done any good.
“Oh, so Don thinks that we’re your servants. I see.”
“You know, Trace, I don’t think he wants you to have friends. He made you stop with the tutoring you were doing because you spent too much time with students. You had to drop out of the PTA because he thought you were being too intrusive with the kids schooling. You even had to stop going to that Bible study that you started with the pastor’s wife…do you even still go to that Church anymore?”
“Stop it! I did quit but, it was only because it was putting stress on our marriage by way of my being gone so much, okay?! We don’t get to spend a lot of time with each other and it has required some personal sacrifices.”
“Yeah, yours.”
“Uh-hum…what exactly has he had to sacrifice…I mean besides having sex with his wife.”
“Dena! That’ll be quite enough! …Look, I’ve got to get the kids up. I don’t want you guys to leave me okay…just wait here till I get the kids up and to school and we can talk.” Traci had just taken a big bite of bait just like a good little fish. Hook, line, and sinker. It didn’t matter what they said really. She always wanted them around and had told Don as much. He had been totally pissed off and told her to loose them. It was the one thing she was firm about with him. Dena and Antwan were the only family she had, even if they weren’t blood. The one concession she had made with Don was that she’d ask them to ease up on the visiting. Though, what did it matter? He was never around to see that they were here anyway.
Sighing once again, Traci made her way up the stairs to the children’s rooms. To her amazement they were both up and nearly dressed. Her little angels! Tamara and Matthew were her one ray of sunshine this morning. Tam was getting to be a real pro at dressing herself and had helped Matt get dressed as well. That is, unless her four year old had figured out how to tie his shoes during the night.
“Wow! You guys look great. Good job, are we ready to go to school?”
“We’re hungry Momma. I smelled the bacon and now my tummy smells it too.”
“Well, we have to hurry up then if we’re going to eat before we leave. It’s getting late. Maybe we can make a plate to go? How’s that?” Tam looked stricken. She loved sitting with Dena and Antwan in the morning and eating breakfast with her little brother. Traci could see her fighting tears but, she was such a good selfless girl.
“Okay Momma but, can I have Dena make mine up?” Traci was touched beyond words. She would never comply with Don’s request now. Dena and Antwan were just as much a joy to her children as they were to her.
She grabbed up both the kids and their bags and raced down stairs after hugging the poor things to death.
If they wanted to sit a few minutes with Dena and Antwan then, by God, they could. She’d just talk with their teacher and have them excused for being a little late. It was one thing to have her own joy stolen from her but; she wouldn’t steal that joy from her children.
“Okay, kids…we’ll eat before we go. And if we’re late then we’re late and I’ll talk with your teachers okay.” Yeah, they were okay.
“…The biggest thing to remember is that most people know they should be taking extra precautions when it’s hot out. The fact is simply that most people do not use their knowledge and follow through. It’s simple enough to prevent but, once you’ve passed the heat exhaustion stage a stroke is imminent and requires immediate medical attention as it can result in death.
“Heat cramps, Heat exhaustion, and Heat stroke…I want a six page paper on the hows, the why’s, and the best course of action for each. If you wish you can create a scenario as long as you meet all of the guide lines I’ve listed on the hand out. It’s due in two weeks. We are having the test next week and I’ll give the review when we meet next. The only bonus I will give, before any of you ask, is a ten point bonus for turning in your paper on test day instead of the week after. Any questions?...
“Okay, I’ll see you day after tomorrow.”
Traci was glad to see them all go. She was also very glad that they had not asked any questions. Her mind had been so distracted all day and while it was easy to recite a lecture, answering questions required her total concentration. Especially with some of the brilliant ones in her class and she used that word loosely. She just hoped that she’d never have one of them trying to administer first aid on her. It crossed her mind that she would have better luck just waiting for the ambulance to arrive than to chance it with these future medics. Traci was going to have to really drill it into their heads if they were going to pass. So far only a hand full of her students could properly perform CPR and the Heimlich maneuver. It would be better if she had them for more than twice a week but, that was what college was all about. The work must come from the student. Professors only had to present the information in an understandable way.
As she began to grade her morning class’s pop quiz, Traci heard her cell phone ring. The thought crossed her mind to just turn the damn thing off but, she knew who was calling. All the more reason to ignore it, you twit.
“Hello.”
“Are you planning on coming home at a reasonable hour tonight?”
“What, no ‘I love you, dear’ or ‘how are things going’?” Oh yeah, this was going to be one hell of a fight. Why did she always have to make it worse?
“Look, I got a call from the school to come pick up the kids…”
“Oh, no! Wait right there buddy. This is your day to pick them up. You know that. This is my late class and I won’t be home for another hour. Don’t blame your forgetfulness on me. I do what is required.” Shit, let’s just dig a deeper hole while we’re at it. Traci’s mouth was going to get her killed one day.
“…You know I don’t have time to take off for that kind of thing and..”
“That kind of thing! That thing would be your children. I didn’t make them by myself and you will make time for them. So, go pick them up! You can yell at me all you want to later but, I am at work and I will not…will not be spoken to like this. I’ve had this job for a couple of years now and this has always been my late night so there is really no excuse for you’re forgetting about your children! Good-bye.”
Oh yeah, it was going to be a fun night. Dena and Antwan were right. Don is just picking fights now. This was totally absurd and Traci couldn’t put up with it any longer. New job or not she was going to lay it out on the line…Tonight. She couldn’t live with a man like him any longer, the man he had become. Screw it! I can grade this shit at home later but, right now…I’m going out for a drink. The bastard! Those are his children too and it’s the only time they get to see him really. He doesn’t fucking care. Well, it’ll be the last time he has to be put out by “spending the evening” with them. He’ll be spending the evening elsewhere.
Pulling into the parking, Traci wondered what she was doing. She should be going home and…and doing what? Fighting with Don, was what. She could do that later and besides, Dena and Antwan kept telling her she needed to check out this new club. Hindered, who was coming up with these names?
Well, she was here. It was all she could do to make herself get out of the car and the walk to the entrance was laced with apprehension. What is Don going to think when I come home smelling like alcohol?
That was it! It was time she stopped thinking about Don. He sure as HELL wasn’t thinking about her or her kids. So what if she wanted to have a couple of drinks before she came home and had the biggest fight next to WWII? She was an adult. He had come home smelling like more than just alcohol before. Which is why she was having her doubts about his loyalty and commitment in the first place! Besides, it wasn’t as if she was there picking some guy up. She didn’t think like that. Traci wondered if Don thought like that or not? Damn it!
Okay, that is the last time she would allow herself to think about him until she went home. There was still a good forty-five minutes before she would normally head home. Once there, Traci was certain, she would have her fill of Don…perhaps more than her fill.
The club wasn’t too crowded, though most of the partiers wouldn’t show up until at least ten or so. Antwan and Dena were right. This place was nice, very nice. There was a dance hall but, it was at the opposite end of the club. The front of it was more or less a pretty classy bar. Very sophisticated. The lighting was just dim enough and there wasn’t the smoky haze that is usually present in most bars. Then again, glancing around the room, it might be that none of the smokers have shown up yet. She couldn’t imagine that any bar or club would have a “no-smoking” policy. (That would not attract many customers.) It was very roomy as well. True, Traci hadn’t been to many bars…at all! but, those she’d seen were “Red-neck” at best.
In front of her stood a very young and very handsome bartender dressed to the nine’s…bow tie and all! He glanced at her a few times and patiently waited for her to settle herself. God, she felt so old! Twenty-five with two children tended to tack on the years. Boy, she did need a drink!
“So…what can I DO for you tonight?” He was flirting! It actually allowed her to relax a bit more. It was nice to be flirted with and pampered. No wonder her friends wanted her to have a night out so bad.
“Just a Long Island Tea, if you can make it not too strong.”
“I can do it anyway you like it, sweet!”
And with that he started flipping around bottles and causing a lot of commotion. Though, it was a spectacular display of manliness, even if she did say so herself. Traci had been so sheltered as far as the “fun” things in life. She was not naive as some might imply but, she was lost when it came to letting loose.
That wasn’t one of her priorities when she found a way to get through school and get out of the slum she grew up in. She was more concerned with making it in life than in “making it” with the skins who wandered the streets or the so called “In” crowd.
That was probably why she fell so hard for Don. They met when she was in college. It had seemed as if he had it all together even back in those days. He had wonderful credit and was very sensible with money. Don had helped her with her finances. He was a genius at budgeting and didn’t mind sharing his secrets with her. It was infatuation, pure and simple.
They had spent many a night studying together at the library and dreaming about their future together. Don talked about their buying a house and getting married. She would work up to a respectable position in her field and he would reach the top of his. They would never have to worry about money again! It all seemed so wonderful back then. Traci went along for the ride and took his advice from A to Z. There should have been red flags waving back then. Don was a little too together. Traci had been a little too eager to heed his advice, come to think of it. It had been Don’s dreams that they were living and yet it didn’t seem as if it was a “good” dream at this point.
It didn’t matter. Traci could not quit thinking about him…them. Avoiding things was something she would just never be any good at. Fight or not she would finish her drink and go home. Part of her wanted everything to work out and for them to put all of this non-sense behind them. The other part was screaming that she deserved better and needed better. Part of her whispered to her at night of some one who would sweep her away and give her…what? What did she want anyway?
Love, devotion, compassion...attention, is that so much to ask?
Not a good sign. Don’s car wasn’t in the drive way or the garage. Traci was desperately trying not to panic. Would he have run off with the kids? It seemed highly unlikely. Something was wrong though…she could feel it. Almost touch it.
Who knows, maybe he had taken the kids to his mother’s house to try and scare her. That was just as unlikely as the first thought. Don was, if nothing else, a creature of habit and he didn’t like other people breaking his routine. Fighting had become fairly routine for them and it wasn’t like him to run off to avoid one.
The door was locked and all of the lights were out. So they hadn’t been home yet or one of the kids would have left their room lights on. Maybe he had gone to his Mother’s house. Well, at least she knew that the kids would get a decent meal over there. Traci had an average relationship with her In-laws. As in, the grandchildren were their world, their son could do no wrong, and they made polite conversation with her. Still, it was more of a family than she had ever known.
Traci hung up her coat and keys then strolled up the stairs to her bedroom. A shower…or better yet, a hot bath! That’s what she needed. A nice, long, hot bath. God, what she wouldn’t do to be able to have the opportunity more often!
She glanced at the phone and thought about checking the voice mail but, decided that whatever Don had to say could be heard after her bath. There was a feeling of drastic change that she couldn’t shake. The thought of a bath gave her hope that she could rinse away that feeling…that foreboding ache. With that thought, Traci headed towards the bathroom. They did after all have a huge tub. Why didn’t she use it more often? God only knows she has enough bathe-salt to start her own store.
The water felt so good. Traci sat there letting the conditioning treatment set in her hair and thinking. Yes, this was the end. There would be no more them…no more Don. No more excuses and silly explanations to the children about why their father couldn’t (more over wouldn’t) make it to their important events. It would be sad for her babies but, together they would work through it. Her babies were strong and smart. They deserved better too.
Time had passed so quickly that Traci hadn’t even notice her bath had gone cold. Toweling off and throwing on some PJ’s she stole up her strength and picked up the phone.
The sun had only been down for a few hours now but, Devyn had been up far longer. He’d felt it again. That strange ache and loneliness and something else. It was so strong that he dressed and headed out in the daylight.
Lore had it that a vampire could not go out in the sun without meeting their deaths. This was not so and yet it is. During the day they are like mortals and are depleted of their strength. The young ones can indeed meet their deaths in the suns rays for they have no strength to spare. It is only the older and more powerful of their kind whom can walk in the light. Not such a gift though as they were comparably likened to an old man! Though given his powers and abilities Devyn was pretty sure he was more comparable to a thirty to forty year old. Not so many vampires could boast as much.
The feeling was strong and yet with the day light beating down on him he was not able to home in on it. Frustrated, Devyn wandered about the city HOPING that he might happen upon the source. Yet, the sun was now set and he was still wandering. And wondering. What the Hell was wrong with him? He was chasing a feeling?! Though, what else did he have to do? Century after century and well, it had to be boredom. And loneliness? To Hell with that, he wasn’t lonely! Devyn needed no one. He was simply making sure that this, this…feeling wasn’t a trap of some sort. Then when he was sure that everything was right or after taking care of the problem, which ever the case may be, he would leave.
For now Devyn needed to restore some of his strength. The sun had definitely taken its toll on him. Yes, and he wouldn’t have enough strength to continue his search if he didn’t “refill” so to speak.
With that Devyn dropped down in front of what appeared to be a very active club. Very nice. He would be able to have his fill and be in and out faster than a drive-through. Or maybe he would find him a couple of sexy young ones to play with for the night. Ah, so much depended on his moods lately…but, if the mood struck him…well, no one had refused yet, or was able to refuse was more to the point.
“You have twenty-eight messages…” God, apparently it was going to be a HUGE fight. Traci took a deep breath and played the first message.
“This is Jane with Gentle Valley Hospital, uhm…I am trying to get hold of Mrs. Davis. There has been an accident and…” The phone fell from her hand. An ACCIDENT. The word seemed to float in front of her eyes and she felt her stomach knot before she retched. Twenty-eight messages…Twenty-eight of them! They had been trying to reach her for a while. While she was out having a drink and thinking about divorce! The guilt made her limbs feel heavy and filled her chest with an awful aching.
She couldn’t even think about hearing the rest of the message, couldn’t. It took everything in her to hang up the phone and dress to head to the hospital. She was sure they would explain there. Where was Don? Was it the kids? God, she needed to listen to the rest of the messages but, couldn’t. She heard herself sobbing as she drove down town but, she couldn’t feel anything at that point. Whatever happened…it was her fault.
Thank God, for parking attendants. She had been against the hospital using them because of the cost but, at this moment they were keeping her from having her car towed.
She could now fill the tension building. Traci knew instinctively it was bad…She always knew. Her pace turned from a mild rush to a full force run through the doors up to the front of the check in line in the ER.
“Ma’am, I’m sorry to interrupt but, I got a call. Something about an accident, I…didn’t get all of the message. I’m…I’m Mrs. Davis. Can you send me to where I need to be? Please…” It was the note in her voice that kept the registration nurse from sending her to the back of the line. Traci waited patiently as the nurse checked the computer. It seemed like an eternity though; it only took a few seconds before the nurse looked up at her with a grim face.
Traci’s heart beat stopped and her breath caught. The nurse told her to go up to CCU on the Third floor. That they would explain everything to her when she got up there and they were waiting for her.
Even the elevators took too long and seemed to take years off of her life as well. It wasn’t even a relief when the doors slowly opened and she saw her In-laws sitting in the CCU lobby outside the locked doors. They immediately noticed her get off the elevator. And how could they not? The doors practically opened to throw her on their lap. And to her horror she didn’t see the children. Things were building to a horrific pitch in her mind as things started adding up. Then, even better, Don’s Mother rose and took a step towards her.
SMACK!
Traci was totally caught off guard as her Mother-in-law slapped her cheek, HARD.
“You stupid little whore! We aren’t allowed in to see Tamara and because of you Don and Matthew are GONE!” She started shaking and nearly fell. Probably would have if Don’s father hadn’t been right there helping her to her seat.
Gone. Gone? She’d used the word gone. Surely she was over playing the drama of the moment just like she always did. Matthew? Where’s Tamara? Traci looked at the doors to CCU and knew that’s where. Mat couldn’t be gone. She wouldn’t believe it. Don’s family was the kind to exaggerate to get the point across. They were manipulative bastards but, Traci couldn’t see even how her Mother-in-law would say something like that about her “precious” son. But she wouldn’t allow herself to think about them, him. She wouldn’t let panic rule her, not just yet anyway. Not until she knew for certain what had happened.
Her breathing was tight and short as she punched the intercom and was escorted through the doors. She didn’t turn to see but, she could feel the heated stares on her as she walked through. It was almost like a dream. It had to be a dream, a really horrible nightmare and she would wake up. Wake up, damn it! She would wake up and have to tell Dana and Tyrone about this horrific dream.
As she approached the front desk an elderly nurse came around to Traci’s side and motioned for her to sit. The nurse pulled up a chair and sat next to her with such compassion and sorrow that Traci knew it was bad. She knew this wasn’t a dream and she could hear herself screaming in her mind.
“Mrs. Davis, I’m not sure how to tell you this. I wanted to sit down with you before we go any further and explain what’s happened. I’m Jane Travis, the charge nurse. Did you get my messages?” Somehow Traci knew it was the lady on the phone. Traci didn’t respond for a moment and tried to gather enough strength to speak. Her would was shattering.
“I got as far as the word accident…and, then I rushed right over.” She felt herself go pale and her stomach was turning again. She had to ask though, she had to know.
“I saw my Mother-in-law in the waiting room.” She met the nurse’s eyes as her own were brimming with tears and continued. “She said that Don and Ma…Matthew were…” God, help her. She couldn’t even finish the question as a sob wrenched through her whole body and she had to fight hard to not to throw up again.
The nurse put a hand on her shoulder.
“Why don’t you let me explain?” Traci only nodded afraid to make eye contact.
“Your husband and children were involved in a car accident. Apparently there was a drunken driver who ran into a semi. The truck-driver tried to correct but, ended up tipping over…” Her gaze washed over Traci with such deep anguish and compassion that Traci knew what was coming next. Her chest was aching like part of her soul was being torn from her. “It nearly flattened two cars. One of them was your husbands…I’m sorry to say that he and your son died instantly. Your daughter was trapped until rescuers were able to tear her out. She’s in pretty bad shape but, she is alive. I want you to look at me. She is alive. She’s breathing on her own but, we have her on oxygen. The ordeal threw her into shock and we’ve not been able to get her out of it. We’re afraid she might slip into a coma.”
Devyn felt it then, stirring and calling him with such violent force he nearly killed the woman her was feeding on. More than that he felt pain. Bitter, heart-wrenching pain. The pull was so strong he was able to latch onto the direction. Without regard for his prey he dropped the woman and shot himself up towards the night sky. His need right then was to find the source of this, thing.
He kept his focus on the strange pulling. It was necessary at that moment to be at the center of the call. It was a need. Devyn had to be there and to end this search. He would be much happier once his search had ended and he could get on with his life.
Stopping in mid sky, Devyn had found the center of the call. He was at a hospital. Rather out of place in this small town, he thought. It was an easy eight story building that was nearly as wide as it was high. He circled it a few times before he landed at the back of the building. Having fed well, he was able to cloak himself from prying eyes and walked straight on into the ER.
Devyn nearly uncloaked and gave away his position when he was assaulted the strong smell of fresh blood and fear. Ah, he had thrived on fear for so long. Mixed with blood, it was an addicting drug. It took a moment to remind himself just why he was there…and it wasn’t to torment already broken humans. And so he slipped into the elevator as it was closing. If it meant he was going to have to do a floor by floor search then that’s exactly what he would do.
The elevator opened to the second floor. Lazily, Devyn strode through the halls until he got to the south hall. The pull was so powerful but, it wasn’t on this floor. He was certain and that could only mean that it, whatever it was, was on the next level right above him. Not bothering with the elevators, he made his way to the stares with supernatural speed.
Once on the floor Devyn had to work hard to stay cloaked. His chest was heavy with sorrow and his limbs felt leaden. His mind was on over drive trying to figure out if this was some type of trap. If so, it was damn good.
Halfway down the hall he came upon the source of his torments. Devyn sucked in his breath. His torment lay over a very battered and still child, sobbing. He was compelled to go closer.
She was tall for a woman and yet not as tall as him. Her hair was a beautiful shade of gold. Peculiar how it was blonde and red at the same time but richly deep and silky. Devyn couldn’t help but watch as the two long braids she had it in kept falling forward and then being propelled back hitting her firm bottom. He could see muscle definition under her soft curves. He was drinking her in. She had freckles like sand on her shoulders that gave her some type of exotic quality he couldn’t describe. And she kept wiping tears from her face.
Her face, he wasn’t able to get a good look at it from his vantage point. Devyn found that he had to look at it. Though he was sure it was angelic as she was an angel sent to tempt him.
There was no taint of a wizard or lycanthrop and she wasn’t a vampire but, he felt a power flowing from her every pore. Somehow he had to meet her, speak to her. Touch her. And now, Devyn had a scent and a face…he could bide his time. That is if the sorrow he felt didn’t tear him in two before then.
Standing there looking at her little girl so battered and broken, Traci just cried. She couldn’t stop the tears from falling. It didn’t matter who saw her crying now, nothing mattered but her little Tamara.
This was all her fault! If she had just given in and picked up the kids at school, maybe none of this would have happened. Maybe then she’d still be able to hold her little boy in her arms and smell his soft, sweet hair. She remembered his smell, his laugh. It hurt to think about his smiling eyes. If he could look at her now…what would be in those eyes? Blame? Yes, blame…it’s what was engulfing her and taking away her breath.
Traci couldn’t think about her lifeless little boy any more. Instead she focused her energy on her little daughter who was slipping away as she sat there. God, she was so helpless! How can she loose both her babies? The tears welled up in her swollen eyes once again and spilled over her red cheeks. She hasn’t lost her baby girl, yet. Not yet and she wouldn’t if she could help it.
Open your eyes, baby. Please! You’ve got to wake up. Don’t leave me…
As she sat there praying to God to save her child a little portly nurse came in the room. Traci moved out of the way as to let the nurse check Tamara’s vital signs and empty her catheter. It was touching to hear the nurse talking to Tamara and telling her what she was doing.
“She can hear us, you know.”
“Do you really believe that?” Traci’s voice shook with another bout of hysteria brought on by this disaster.
“Oh, yes ma'm. I know she can. You can see on the monitors the brain activity when she’s spoken too.” The old nurse looked Traci over with such sympathy and pulled up a chair next to the bed and sat.
“Hun, you look like you’re about to pass out. Go get you something to eat at the cafeteria and I’ll sit here with your girl and chart.” She handed Traci a little punch card and explained it was for the families of patients so they would be provided with free meals while they stayed with the patients.
“Now go on…you’re not doing your daughter any good in the state you’re in. Get some food and a cup of coffee and I’ll stay with her ‘till you come back.”
“Thank you.”
Traci was thankful for the little, chubby old nurse for being so kind to her. She was even more thankful that her in-laws were gone. It had been hours since she’d been there and yet it still seemed like she just walked in to find out about the…accident. Her stomach had been tied in knots but, now she had to admit that she was getting hungry.
The guilt still ate at her. Nothing she did made it go away. This all could have been avoided had she not gotten so upset with Don. Had she not tried to make a point and been so damn stubborn! Had she thought a little more of her kids than making her dead beat husband do his part! Had she been a better Mother!
The tears fell again and suddenly her plate of food didn’t smell so good. In fact, her stomach was twisting again and turning and she had to get up…she needed some air.
He’d been watching the woman for hours now and became excited as she left the small room in ICU. Devyn followed her down to the cafeteria and still he waited. Everything seemed so strange and he could not help but wait for the trap to be set. Nothing. Now, he was just waiting for the right opportunity to approach the woman. Though, what would he say to her? One did not just approach a human woman and tell her that he’d been tracking her for months now. Oh, and by the way, I’m a vampire. Yeah, he could see that going over real well.
As he was turning it over in his mind, the woman suddenly bolted up and looked as if she were about to go into a sprint. Instinctively, Devyn was behind her and he found his hand on her shoulder before he was able to come to his senses.
The woman whirled around and met his steady gaze. His breath slammed out of him as he finally got a good look at her face. She was Heaven to his Hell. Her jaw was defined and yet very sensual, very feminine. She had huge grey eyes that reminded him of silver pools. They were puffy and swollen, no doubt from all the crying he had watched her do. His gaze fell to her lips and he felt his mouth moisten. They were full but thin and very sexy. She looked so sorrowful that his chest tightened as she stared into his cold black eyes. It took him a moment to even find his voice.
“Do you mind if I sit with you?”
Traci just stared at the man. She knew him didn’t she? She was about to loose it again when he seemingly appeared out of nowhere. There hadn’t been anyone in the cafeteria with her except the staff, had there? That was it. She was just loosing her sanity. Traci hadn’t felt like company but, maybe she needed the distraction.
“No, I don’t mind. I’m Traci…and you are?”
“Devyn, Devyn McGregor. I’m not interrupting your dinner am I?”
“Huh?...oh, uhm…No, I was just a little spooked I guess. This place is quiet and empty at night and I’m not used to being alone. I guess I could use some company.” Her face turned bright red. She could feel the color in her cheeks. Traci was feeling a little silly now that she was talking. He probably thought she was a babbling idiot but, she couldn’t bring herself to care at that point. Any company was good company if it wasn’t her in-laws and she couldn’t face her friends yet. God, she hadn’t even called them yet! What would she even tell them? Would they blame her…forgive her?
Devyn found he was intent on just listening to the sound of her voice. Beautiful. But, she seemed to fade in and out on him. Her eyes glossed over and started to fill with tears and his chest did that crunching thing again. She was distracted. It should have been evident by what he’d watched up stairs. That was her daughter in the hospital bed he had learned from the nurses. Of course she would be upset. This woman had just lost her son and husband and all that was left was her little daughter who was on the verge of a coma. Devyn couldn’t bring himself to be sorry for the loss of her husband and he cursed himself for the joy of knowing she was not tied to anyone.
What was even worse was his need to slip into her mind. It was taking all of his will power not to spy on her thoughts. Especially since her thoughts would take her over like they were now. He didn’t need to spy on her thoughts to feel the deep pain and sorrow she was feeling…and something more. Regret? Shame.
“Are you okay?” It was more than a compulsion it was a necessity as he took hold of her hand and just held it. She was so cold.
“Oh, uhm, yes, I’m okay. I’m fine.” He’d startled her. She was so absorbed in thought that she had forgotten he was there.
“I’ve really got to get back up stairs and check on my daughter. Really, thank you for sitting with me but…”
“Come outside and get some air with me first. I could use a cigarette. Do you smoke?” Devyn put a small compulsion in his voice so she would follow him. The sun would be coming up in a few hours and he wanted to spend a little more time with this woman before he rested.
“Just for a minute and them I really need to get back up to my daughter.”
The night was quite in this town and the air had a cold bite to it. Devyn noticed the woman was shivering. In one swift move he had draped his thick leather jacket over her shoulders. He realized just how small and helpless this woman really was standing next to one so powerful. Yet, he felt as if he’d do anything she wanted him to do. He had to know, was this one of the wizard’s traps? Devyn, as a general rule, didn’t socialize with the mortals. They were just a food supply if they were anything to him. Yet, when this woman, Traci, shivered, he felt compelled to warm her. When she cried he needed to comfort her. When he stood next to her, he didn’t feel empty.
“How long have you lived here…Traci?” He felt wickedly sensual when he rolled her name off of his tongue. He lit the cigarette and inhaled deeply before she answered.
“All of my life. I actually grew up in the next town over.” She’d stopped shivering in his jacket. God, it was so warm and felt so good…like he was holding her to him.
“Where are you from, Devyn, wasn’t it? You have some kind of an accent but, it’s not a southern one. I can usually tell them apart being southern myself.” He nodded.
“I’m from a little village in Scotland but, I’ve done a lot of traveling. I suppose that’s why my accent has faded.” It was mostly the truth. Traveling and living for as long as he had did have a way of smoothing off the rough Scottish brogue.
“Wow, I’ve got some Scottish blood. I’ve always wanted to visit there but, I never had the money. When I did have the money I didn’t have the time. If my baby girl gets better, I’m going to make the time.” Tears fell unchecked down her soft cheeks once again. Without thought, Devyn pulled her to him and kissed them away. She struggled for a moment but, as he just held her she went still. He sensed her needing to be held and found that he wanted to hold her just as much as she needed it.
Traci couldn’t find her voice and was struggling to breath. She didn’t like wanting to stay in his arms but, she liked it anyway. It was the first time she felt the pain and guilt ebb since she had gotten to the hospital. Selfish, yes, she knew it was selfish to want to forget her pain but, as she was finding out…Traci was very selfish. So, she laid her head to his chest and let herself drown in the silence of the early morning.
Finally, she was able to find her voice as the first rays of sunlight came over the horizon. Her voice was husky and rough to her ears.
“I really need to go check on my daughter now.”
“I know.”
“I…uh, I don’t want you to think that I just go throwing myself into strange men’s arms. I was just, I don’t know, overwhelmed is a good word for it.”
“I know.”
“Look, I want to thank you for talking to me. It’s just that I…” She couldn’t think with him staring at her that way. It felt like he was looking into her soul. As much as she hated herself for it…she liked the way he looked at her.
Devyn liked the way she squirmed under his gaze. It was some what of a treat to see a real reaction from a mortal. He could force her to do what he wanted and he wanted to taste those lips. Her bare neck was a temptation in and of itself. Yet, he tired of everyone bending to his will. More than that, it mattered to him whether or not she kissed him of her own will and not from his compulsion.
“I should be going myself.”
“Going?” There was almost a panic in her voice and he felt that twisting, aching in his chest again.
“I’ll be back tonight. We can talk over some coffee if you’d like?”
“Yes.”
“Go on then. I know you want to check on your daughter and I’ve kept you from it for far too long. I’m sorry. It’s just you looked like you needed a distraction. I’m very good at distracting beautiful ladies.”
His grin was sinful but, she smiled with him. Traci believed he very much was a distraction to any woman. His long black hair and dark sensual eyes were murder to any woman. Then you add his well shaped body…arms that are strong when he holds you and shoulders begging you to lay your head on them…yeah, he was a killer with the ladies. She didn’t even want to notice his ass. It took everything in her not to watch as he walked across the parking lot.
Yup, she was definitely a horrible person. She’d left her little daughter who was slipping away into a coma, alone for hours while she found comfort in a handsome stranger’s arms. What was wrong with her?!
As Traci stepped off of the elevator she realized she still had that man’s jacket. She was glad. It seemed to emanate heat of its own accord.
“Oh, there you are, hun. I’ve been checking in on your daughter. She’s got some color back in her cheeks and her vitals are good. I’ve got to get ready for shift change but, I’ll see you again tonight.”
“Thank you very much and I’m sorry I was gone for so long. I guess I needed some air more than I thought.”
“You look like it did you some good. The doctors will be coming up to check on her in a few hours and I imagine they’ll want to talk with you. If you need anything just ask, okay?”
“Thank you again, I will.”
Once the nurse had left, Traci took hold of Tamara’s hand and squeezed it.
“Tam, Tamara…Mommy’s here. Don’t leave me okay. I love you. I don’t know if you can hear me or not but, I’m sorry. I’m sorry for this happening but, I’m here now and we’ll make it through, okay. You’re strong and can come out of this. I…I miss you. I miss your brother and I’m so sorry, baby girl. It’s all my fault and I’ll never be able to make it up to you. I’m going to try to though…so come back to me. Please…I love you so much and you’re all I have left. You’re all that matters.” Traci glanced at the monitor and just like the nurse said, the brain waves were very active. She could even see her daughter’s eyes flutter and for a moment Traci held her breath. Please!
Nothing happened. The breath that she’d been holding came out in a low sob and she squeezed her daughter’s hand once more.
“You’re doing good, baby. Keep trying…keep trying and come back to me.”
The knocking on the door woke her, though Traci didn’t remember falling asleep. She wasn’t sure what to think of the group of doctors that walked in. Each of their name badges displayed their different specialties. It was the Neurologist who spoke first and told her what they’d been saying all of last night. She was in shock and if she didn’t pull out of it soon she’d slip into a coma.
God, what use were these people! She was a nurse herself and nothing they told her was new. It shouldn’t have surprised her. Yet, they instilled some hope in her. They were very optimistic because her brain waves were very active. They were hoping with a little physical therapy and coaxing that she’d snap out of it. It would begin that evening. A therapist would come in and move her legs and arms to keep up the muscle tone.
She was glad for the words of encouragement but, was happy to see them leave. Glancing at the clock, Traci sighed heavily. Dena and Antwan were probably worried out of their minds by now. There was no more putting it off; she had to call them. Really, she wanted to hear their voices. At least they were familiar voices and she needed that right now. What she really needed was to hear her daughter’s voice. Or wanted?
When she got off the phone with Dena, Traci slouched down on the couch. She had no more tears. She had no more strength or hope or anything. It was like she couldn’t even feel…she was completely empty. Her friend had offered to make the funeral arrangements for Matthew and Don and Traci didn’t object. It was rather a relief. Thinking about her dead little boy was just not an option at this point for her. And Don, well, she didn’t even want to think about it. It was just too much…way too much to swallow.
Without thinking she grabbed the leather jacket that she’d worn last night…that the stranger had left. Well, he wasn’t really a stranger anymore but, she still didn’t really know anything about him. She couldn’t shake the feeling that she knew him, though. No matter, it seemed of little importance and yet donning his jacket she felt alright. It was still warm. It must just be nerves. That has to be it. Her whole world had crumbled within the span of an evening and her nerves were wrecked. It was really no wonder. She was probably going into a kind of shock herself. Things just didn’t seem real.
Yet, when she looked at her tiny bruised daughter reality seemed to set in…HARD.
Traci pulled up the chair next to her daughter and sat once again. Feeling a little silly but, not caring, she started to sing to Tamara.
“Sing a song of six pence, a pocket full of rye, four and twenty black birds baked in a pie, when the pie was open the birds began to sing, wasn’t that a tasty dish to set before the king? The king was in his counting house, counting out his money, the Queen was in the parlor, eating bread and honey, the maid was in the garden hanging out the clothes, when a long came a black bird and snipped off her...”
“Noooosssssse”
Traci jumped up. Had she heard that? Was it her imagination? Please, God, don’t let it be my mind playing tricks on me!
“Tamara…baby, can you talk? Can you talk to Mommy? Please, say it again.” Holding her breath she stood there, afraid to even blink dare she miss it.
Nothing.
“Tamara, baby…please come back to Mommy. PLEASE, I love you.”
“I love…you.”
Tears spilled down Traci’s cheeks when she thought she had none left. She screamed for the nurses as she stared into her little girl’s beautiful eyes. Thank you, THANK YOU GOD!
Tamara tried to say more but, was wearing herself out with the effort. Traci just held her hand and stayed glued next to her as the nurses came in to evaluate her new condition. They were shining lights in her eyes and asking her all sorts of questions to which she was too exhausted to answer and could only nod. Finally, the nurses left and went to call the doctor. They were left alone in the room together.
“I’m…sleepy Momma.” Tamara’s voice sounded so weak and frail. It reminded Traci of an echo far away from them. God, she was back but, she was still so weak!
“I know, baby. I know but, you have to stay awake for a while, okay? We need to keep you awake so you don’t slip back into shock or worse. Momma’s been so worried about you.” Try as she might, Traci couldn’t keep the shake out of her voice. This was a miracle! She thought she had lost everything and now…her little girl was talking to her. It was too much of an emotional ride for one day.
“Momma?”
“Yes, baby girl.”
“Where is Matthew?” It didn’t surprise Traci that her daughter would be so worried about her little brother. That was her way. She’s always loved that about her daughter.
“Baby, I don’t know that this is the time…” She could see in her daughter’s gaze that she wouldn’t let it rest and something in her needed to know. She needed closure.
“He didn’t make it, baby. Neither did your Daddy. I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry. I should’ve picked you guys up. I should’ve…” Traci stopped short when her daughter grabbed hold of her hand and squeezed. She was a smart little girl. They sat in silence until the doctors came in to check on Tamara. Life had caught them both off guard. It was a hard lesson to learn for Traci…an even harder lesson for her six year old daughter.
Dena arrived at the hospital just before sunset. Traci was very glad to see her old friend and even more glad to see such a response out of her daughter. Tamara always thought of Dena as an aunt. Those two shared a special bond of mischief and Traci wouldn’t have had it any other way.
“I brought you something, stick pole.”
“What?” Tamara’s eyes sparkled with curiosity.
“I got you the whole set of Harry Potter books…well, what’s out so far, anyway. I thought since you’d be stuck here for a little while, you should have some good reading material.” She handed over the neatly wrapped box and the two of them tore into it. Paper flew everywhere and Traci couldn’t believe her ears as her young daughter and best friend giggled like teenage girls at a slumber party. It was very humbling, in deed.
“Traci, I’m going to stay and read to Tamara for a while. Why don’t you go home or head over to my place and take a shower. Get something to eat while you’re at it. You need a break, okay.”
“I really shouldn’t go. I mean, she just came back to us this morning and…”
“And you really need to take a shower.” Dena pulled Traci out in the hall, smiling at Tamara mischievously.
“Look, you need to get some rest and take a break. You have been through a lot, A LOT. Take a break tonight, okay. Just a few hours for yourself.”
“Dena, that’s how all of this happened! I took a few hours for myself yesterday…I’m to blame for all of this! I can’t leave her…I can’t.”
“Trace, girl, just listen to me, okay? At least go and take you a shower at my house and maybe a nap. You’re no good to your daughter in this condition. You can trust me with her.” Tears welled up and barely managed to keep from spilling over on Traci’s cheeks.
“I’ll only be gone long enough to take a shower and maybe get some clothes.”
Making her way through the parking lot, Traci realized she was still wearing that man’s jacket. Devyn. She was supposed to meet him for coffee! Spinning around she sprinted back towards the cafeteria entrance. She’d made it half way across the parking lot and then...SMACK!
The force in which she hit him nearly dropped her on her bottom. It probably would have had he not caught her and steadied her.
“I’m so sorry.” Her blush was from head to toe. She was so embarrassed. Here she was, a grown woman, sprinting across the hospital parking lot and running straight into the man she was going to meet. God, she was an idiot.
“What’s the rush? Nothing serious I hope.” He knew why she was running. It was the way she blushed. Devyn found that he loved that about her.
“Oh, nothing. I…” Okay, so what was she supposed to tell this guy? I was sprinting across the parking lot because I forgot I was supposed to meet with you tonight…and I didn’t want to stand you up.
“You wanna go get that coffee?” It was the best she could come up with. Better to throw them off guard with a question of your own than to fess up to being an idiot.
“Sure. It doesn’t have to be hospital coffee does it? Do you know any good coffee shops around here?”
“Oh, yes. My car’s just over this way.”
“This isn’t a very big town…I thought we could walk. If you don’t mind?” She looked both startled and pleased with the suggestion.
“O…Okay.”
posted by boabhan sith at 12:01 AM
2 Comments:
you get me...:) here is your most regular reader! :)
whoa that was a great story. i wonder are you an author because you should really get this published. the way you build up your story was captivating. i can't wait to read the latest installment of this series. oh and thank you 4 making my day with such a wonderful read. thank you very much.
by the way i am a budding online author too so i hopr you will read thru some of the stories and poems i have written and to give me your honest opinion. my blog is at: http://jolynone.blogspot.com
thanks once again.
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